Not much been happening of late because I’ve decided to take on more transcribing work. I did think my last efforts were pretty pathetic, I mean I completed the job but I didn’t have my ear glued to the speaker every time I didn’t hear a word properly and instead just wrote in an ellipsis. However, I’ve taken on four more CDs worth so it’s been keeping me busy. I guess I’ve just got to keep thinking about the payment as my brain cells slowly die of boredom but this won’t happen till the end of September. That seems ages away, doesn’t it?
On another note I was listening to Colin Murray the other day and in particular the Black Hole segment of the show which is where people send in stuff to be played. I was knocked back when someone sent in Al Pacino’s monologue from Any Given Sunday. It’s truly a stunning piece of acting but when you just hear just the audio it adds an extra poignancy to the meaning of the words. I almost wanted to learn American Football after I heard it or Gridiron as I think it’s called here. Anyway, I would send you the YouTube link but I think it’s better just in audio so if I find that I’ll post it for you to check out.
Here’s some more prose to check out if you have a moment.
On another note I was listening to Colin Murray the other day and in particular the Black Hole segment of the show which is where people send in stuff to be played. I was knocked back when someone sent in Al Pacino’s monologue from Any Given Sunday. It’s truly a stunning piece of acting but when you just hear just the audio it adds an extra poignancy to the meaning of the words. I almost wanted to learn American Football after I heard it or Gridiron as I think it’s called here. Anyway, I would send you the YouTube link but I think it’s better just in audio so if I find that I’ll post it for you to check out.
Here’s some more prose to check out if you have a moment.
***********************************
“What d’ya reckon?”
“Yeah, ok, didn’t just write down the first thing that came through my mind which was that he was an absolute lunatic. You?”
“I don’t really know, I thought I answered what was asked in the essay question but I sort of answered my own questions. Don’t really know what’ll happen. Pint of London Pride and…”
“I’ll have a pint of Stella please. Cheers Yan.”
“No worries, well there’s nothing more to do now than just drink this day away, well until I’ve got to go to work. It’s one thing after another in the life of routine. You get up, you get dressed, take an exam, go to the pub, go to work, go home, chill, bed.”
“Fuck off. That’s your choice. You need to plan things out so that you know exactly what’s happening in the world. Well, your world anyway.”
“What do you mean?”
“Here you go gents, that’ll be £5.80 please.”
“You think that by planning everything out in one go the night before is what life is about. Well it isn’t. Your life is revolved around the things that you do, and you do a lot of them, especially working. You forget that the world carries on spinning, revolving on its own regardless of all the other private world’s people have like yours. It’s because of this that I adopt the spontaneity approach. I don’t want to be constantly updating my agenda for my own private world I want to be part of the actual world. I’m always keeping my channels open, able to change a decision or plan like I change my cereals each morning. I can’t be bothered to set up a plan for the next day, commit myself to work and then actually go to the place after I’ve just taken my last exam forever. For fucks sakes you should use the pub as the starting point for a whole night of debauchery, releasing all that anxiety and letting it all go, not drinking with one eye constantly gazing at the clock and half your mind waiting for an appropriate time to let you know that you should really start getting ready for work.”
“Here, don’t worry about the 20p. Look, I make my choices because I want to, I choose to try and be organised. I’m not. But compared to you, you’re right my life is planned out. So I try and make a plan the night before so when I wake…”
“That’s just it. Why? Why do you need a plan? When you wake up first thing in the morning can’t you just fold your arms behind the back of your head and stare up at the ceiling thinking what shall I do today?”
“I do, to a certain extent. When I wake up there’s a blank black canvas in my mind and I try recollect any thoughts, I think to myself where am I? Where am I going? Where have I been? It’s only after a good two minutes of rubbing my eyes that my mind starts to realise what I’ve got to do today. I’ve even started to write it down."
“Write it down? I feel sorry for you. You need to let go, let go of responsibility. I don’t mean forever and totally. But you’re clutching at it too tightly refusing to let go even slightly, thinking by letting go you’re dropping your own personal standards or that you’ll change your perspective of life and maybe that’s what’s scaring you. The thought of skipping work without reason fills you with a kind of dread even though deep down you know that it actually isn’t that bad. You think what’s bad is that maybe you’ll start to change. That’s your problem.”
“No it isn’t. I’m normal, it’s you that choose your own way.”
“Exactly.”
“That’s not what I meant. I mean you just do what you want to do, which is fine, but you don’t have a concept of the repercussions of what will happen if you don’t go through with what you said you would. The other day, I waited for half an hour for you at the pub to turn up reading the same old local newspaper until I even had to turn to the personal pages because I got so bored.”
“I texted you.”
“Yeah, after half an hour. You couldn’t be bothered to text earlier or even call, but that isn’t what I’m getting at. My point is that you choose what you do because you don’t want to be tied down to anything. That’s why you don’t last in a job because one day you decide that you don’t want to go to work so don’t. But you don’t even call in to tell them you’re sick or give them some other excuse. You just shut yourself off from that chapter of commitment thinking it’s done and dusted with. But it isn’t, the people ask why hasn’t Keith come into work today? Then the next day people ask, where is Keith? Then someone will call you. But you won’t answer, no. You cancel the call on your mobile because already in your mind you’ve closed down that chapter of commitment and now your moving on. You unplug the house phone when that rings. Remember when we worked in the plastics factory together last summer, well you only lasted two weeks before one day you didn’t turn up. And people started asking me if you was ill, and at first I said I didn’t know but after the fourth day and the manager calling me into his office talking to me as if it was my fault you’d disappeared I told people I didn’t know where you was and I didn’t fucking care either. So if you’re telling me that I’m scared of changing my life why don’t you prove to yourself that you ain’t scared of changing yours and the next time you don’t turn up for something don’t unplug your phone or cancel the call on your mobile instead answer it and tell whoever it is that you’ve decided to do something else.”
“Yeah, ok, didn’t just write down the first thing that came through my mind which was that he was an absolute lunatic. You?”
“I don’t really know, I thought I answered what was asked in the essay question but I sort of answered my own questions. Don’t really know what’ll happen. Pint of London Pride and…”
“I’ll have a pint of Stella please. Cheers Yan.”
“No worries, well there’s nothing more to do now than just drink this day away, well until I’ve got to go to work. It’s one thing after another in the life of routine. You get up, you get dressed, take an exam, go to the pub, go to work, go home, chill, bed.”
“Fuck off. That’s your choice. You need to plan things out so that you know exactly what’s happening in the world. Well, your world anyway.”
“What do you mean?”
“Here you go gents, that’ll be £5.80 please.”
“You think that by planning everything out in one go the night before is what life is about. Well it isn’t. Your life is revolved around the things that you do, and you do a lot of them, especially working. You forget that the world carries on spinning, revolving on its own regardless of all the other private world’s people have like yours. It’s because of this that I adopt the spontaneity approach. I don’t want to be constantly updating my agenda for my own private world I want to be part of the actual world. I’m always keeping my channels open, able to change a decision or plan like I change my cereals each morning. I can’t be bothered to set up a plan for the next day, commit myself to work and then actually go to the place after I’ve just taken my last exam forever. For fucks sakes you should use the pub as the starting point for a whole night of debauchery, releasing all that anxiety and letting it all go, not drinking with one eye constantly gazing at the clock and half your mind waiting for an appropriate time to let you know that you should really start getting ready for work.”
“Here, don’t worry about the 20p. Look, I make my choices because I want to, I choose to try and be organised. I’m not. But compared to you, you’re right my life is planned out. So I try and make a plan the night before so when I wake…”
“That’s just it. Why? Why do you need a plan? When you wake up first thing in the morning can’t you just fold your arms behind the back of your head and stare up at the ceiling thinking what shall I do today?”
“I do, to a certain extent. When I wake up there’s a blank black canvas in my mind and I try recollect any thoughts, I think to myself where am I? Where am I going? Where have I been? It’s only after a good two minutes of rubbing my eyes that my mind starts to realise what I’ve got to do today. I’ve even started to write it down."
“Write it down? I feel sorry for you. You need to let go, let go of responsibility. I don’t mean forever and totally. But you’re clutching at it too tightly refusing to let go even slightly, thinking by letting go you’re dropping your own personal standards or that you’ll change your perspective of life and maybe that’s what’s scaring you. The thought of skipping work without reason fills you with a kind of dread even though deep down you know that it actually isn’t that bad. You think what’s bad is that maybe you’ll start to change. That’s your problem.”
“No it isn’t. I’m normal, it’s you that choose your own way.”
“Exactly.”
“That’s not what I meant. I mean you just do what you want to do, which is fine, but you don’t have a concept of the repercussions of what will happen if you don’t go through with what you said you would. The other day, I waited for half an hour for you at the pub to turn up reading the same old local newspaper until I even had to turn to the personal pages because I got so bored.”
“I texted you.”
“Yeah, after half an hour. You couldn’t be bothered to text earlier or even call, but that isn’t what I’m getting at. My point is that you choose what you do because you don’t want to be tied down to anything. That’s why you don’t last in a job because one day you decide that you don’t want to go to work so don’t. But you don’t even call in to tell them you’re sick or give them some other excuse. You just shut yourself off from that chapter of commitment thinking it’s done and dusted with. But it isn’t, the people ask why hasn’t Keith come into work today? Then the next day people ask, where is Keith? Then someone will call you. But you won’t answer, no. You cancel the call on your mobile because already in your mind you’ve closed down that chapter of commitment and now your moving on. You unplug the house phone when that rings. Remember when we worked in the plastics factory together last summer, well you only lasted two weeks before one day you didn’t turn up. And people started asking me if you was ill, and at first I said I didn’t know but after the fourth day and the manager calling me into his office talking to me as if it was my fault you’d disappeared I told people I didn’t know where you was and I didn’t fucking care either. So if you’re telling me that I’m scared of changing my life why don’t you prove to yourself that you ain’t scared of changing yours and the next time you don’t turn up for something don’t unplug your phone or cancel the call on your mobile instead answer it and tell whoever it is that you’ve decided to do something else.”
A silence and a disgusted look at Keith’s face indicated that this topic was over for the time being as both sets of eyes spotted a group of middle aged men leaving their seats by the pool table. Keith and Yannish take a simultaneous quick sip from the top of their pints to avoid any spillage and dart towards the leather cushioned seats before any other trained hawk eyes notice the men waddling out of the pub.
