Networking

There are many things that I am not good at, but networking is something I do not really like and am rubbish at doing. The garbling and exchanging of information and pleasantries are all achievable. It’s the way the majority of people turn all false that I don’t like. Also when someone yanks out a business card and shoves it in front of my face. I’m not too keen on that either.

This is only because I can’t handle the masquerading of it all. Sometimes when people approach me I think, ‘what are you after?’ And I feel bad for feeling this because I do like to help people but at the same time some people don’t deserve help and so I then try and work out how much information I want to give them.

Then there are times I’m boxed into a corner as someone strikes up a somewhat friendly conversation and the next thing they are trying to illicit what kind of synchronous technology I use and if it was applied what training elements were involved. I do not mind giving this information because, quite frankly I believe it should be passed on so that someone somewhere can do something really interesting with it, what I don’ t like is this tactic of acting to be my friend but at the same time just wanting something of me. I don’t mind that being asked about stuff it’s just that approach which really annoys me.

Sometimes when I realise it is happening I decide to give out some incomplete information just so I feel better because I’m sure they walk away thinking, ‘what a fool, he doesn’t realise I don’t care about him, and now I’ve got what I want...’ That way, they can think like that and I can smirk to myself knowing they haven’t got the complete picture.

What is rather funny is when I am looking for information. Say at an event or conference, I spend at least half an hour watching people walking around interacting, whilst I wrestle with myself about who to decide to approach first. When I finally decide to strike up a conversation, it always begins with me thinking, ‘I feel a right idiot for doing this.’ But I always begin and maintain the topic of what I want as the main discussion, none of this flattery, like ‘you must be really proud of yourself,’ or even stuff about my appearance, ‘your hair looks really good’. My hair doesn’t look good because it takes 0.3 seconds for me to style it in the mornings and I don’t wake up and spend all day beaming with pride.

Fortunately, there are some really nice people out there that wish to exchange information and do so without being smarmy or cunning. What’s even better is that sometimes you start to discover the person they are and you end up thinking that you would really like to work on a project with them. I guess the nature of networking is not to make friends but it also shouldn’t involve bad acting.

In other news, you may recall my post about my iPod being broken. Well, I can honestly say I can now stand tall amongst the likes of Maurice Moss, Screech Powers, Professor Frink and of course him . I took the whole thing apart (whilst making sure I was earthed), removed the hard drive, the battery and unscrewed the ear phone jack and replaced it. And it still worked after!